First of all, thank you Lorne for having me here today. Lorne told me that he would allow me to do a guest blog on his site…so long as I was interesting. So, I have decided to tell you about something embarrassing that happened to me; in hopes that you will find it amusing. If you do, perhaps I will work it into the third book in the Jersey Shore Mystery Series.
At the end of the expo, there was a banquet for police chiefs, attended by more than 300 chiefs and special guests. I was seated at a VIP table. Joining me were a colonel from the New Jersey State Police and a number of dignitaries from West Point, the F.B.I., and other law enforcement agencies. Being only in my early twenties at the time, this was somewhat intimidating for me. I tried my best to mind my manners, use the right fork, speak only when spoken to, etc. A very stressful dinner for me, to say the least.
At the end of the meal, our server came along with a tray of chocolates for dessert. I selected one, as did everyone at the table, and placed it on my plate. I wondered how I would eat it. I feared I’d look like a barn-yard animal picking it up with my hands and taking a bite. It was too large to pop the entire thing in my mouth. Would I get chocolate on my teeth or on my face? I waited and contemplated my options.
The speeches at the front of the room had begun. The outgoing president of the association was making his final remarks. The new president would soon be sworn in. The chocolate sat in front of me, tempting me. I’m a chocoholic by nature. I can’t have a piece of chocolate in front of me and not eat it. I finally made a decision to cut the chocolate piece in half with my fork and knife, making it small enough to eat with my utensils. I thought that would be more lady-like.
I situated my fork atop the luscious-looking piece of heaven with my left hand, and dug into it with my knife in my right hand. The chocolate had other ideas for me. It shot out from under the knife, off my plate, across the table, between two of the VIPs at my table, and smacked into the back of the chair of a man the next table over. My face glowed in the dim dinner lighting with eight shades of red. I swiftly returned my fork and knife to their rightful positions alongside my plate, to hide the evidence. I breathed a sigh of relief when I glanced around quickly and realized that the man in the chair that was hit by the chocolate bullet did not notice. Everyone at my table was too busy watching the speeches in front to pay attention to me and my dessert malfunction as well. Embarrassment averted! That is, until I heard laughter beside me. To my right, that State Police Colonel was chuckling. I looked at him and was greeted by an, “I saw that.” Turning red once more, I giggled nervously, then replied, “Please don’t tell anyone.”
He shook his head and laughed some more. “I won’t,” he told me. I believe he kept his promise. I look back at the experience and laugh about it now—many, many years later.
So, what do you think? Is it funny enough to include a similar story in the next of my humorous mystery? Don’t forget to comment and tell me if my experience is book worthy!
About Author Michele Lynn Seigfried:
Michele Lynn Seigfried is an award-winning novelist, a children's author and illustrator and a public speaker who was born and raised in New Jersey. Her background as a communication major and art minor, and her 15 years of experience working in government mix together to bring you creative and fun novels and books. Connect with her on her website www.michelelynnseigfried.com and check out her mystery novels, Red Tape, Book 1 and TaxCut, Book 2 in the in the Jersey Shore Mystery series, available on Amazon.com and Barnesandnoble.com
You’ll L.O.L. because Municipal Clerk Chelsey Alton is at it again! Working for a government riddled with crime, she and her sidekick Bonnie investigate to find out the answer to the pressing question: Who killed Vinny Buttiglieri? She finds herself entangled with dangerous mobsters and corrupt politicians. She thinks she’s doing the right thing, but can she save herself when she becomes entrenched too deep in this Jersey shore mystery?